29 Random, Fabulous, And Bitchy Things That Happened At The Men's Fashion Shows In London

    BREAKING: Male models are divas, too.

    1. Offering a "highbrow" start to proceedings, Mayor of London Boris Johnson posed with male models and fit in just perfectly.

    2. Boris also took the time to talk with British GQ about the whole menswear circus.

    3. One of the season's first shows: rising talent Alex Mattson set the bar high* with his futuristic, militaristic take on Rastafarian culture. Amazing.

    4. Mattson also collaborated with rising rap talent Brooke Candy on some new music that's also amazing.

    w.soundcloud.com

    Candy performed during Mattson's show — you'll notice a theme here, because it was also (also) amazing.

    5. These pleated mandals happened at Kay Kwok.

    As did these sculptural mandals.

    Kwok's space-age digital prints were another early highlight of the London shows.

    6. Topman Design presented a collection that fell just sort of the "rhinestone cowboy" cliche.

    Also at the Topman Design show, these guys:

    From now on I plan to exclusively attend shows dressed as Archimedes from Disney's The Sword in the Stone.

    7. Following the Astrid Andersen show, you'll never be able to look at net curtains in the same way.

    8. Suddenly, they're kind of sexy.

    9. Also, here's a highlight from the new Jonathan Saunders collection:

    10. A new trend in London's fashion show venues: high places, literally.

    11. Dazed & Confused commissioned three short films showcasing new menswear designers making their mark on the London scene.

    The cinematic trio ("Boys of Edfu," "Boy Alone With Himself," and "A Film for Elena Crehan") screened alongside another short produced in partnership with the British Fashion Council as the official menswear movie — filmmaker Matt Lambert showing (off) lots of attractive young models getting dressed in their favorite clothes. As a concept, it really can't go wrong.

    Here's "Boys of Edfu," directed by Can Evgin.

    And this delightful bubble-fest is "Boy Alone With Himself," directed by Alexandros Pissourios.

    More bubbles, and a face that lights up. Or something.

    12. Craig Green showed another riotous, abstract collection as part of the MAN showcase.

    Just a reminder, here's some highlights of Green's fall/winter 2013 collection:

    13. A few weeks prior to London's menswear shows, male model David Gandy appeared on a British chat show and roundly criticized the work of young, conceptual designers like Green.

    Upon seeing photos of fall 2013 designs by Sibling and Craig Green, Gandy remarked, "I was at [the Craig Green] show actually and I got a bit pissed off. I thought, 'who does that?"... If someone said put this [plank] in front of your face I would have gone off."

    Aside from missing the point that a model's job is to wear whatever they're presented with, Gandy's condescending take on London's creativity didn't go down well — Dazed reports his request for a ticket at Green's show this season was denied. Writing for The Independent, Alexander Fury offered up the best response. A headline starting "Drivel-spouting David Gandy," after all, is taking quite the stand.

    The Telegraph comes a close second, however:

    14. Back to the MAN runways: Bobby Abley showed budgies, fleur-de-lis and those crowns you used to get at Burger King birthday parties.

    15. And among the Missoni-esque knitted separates in Alan Taylor's show, he taunted one model with a sweater that could well be worn either way up.

    16. If you lost friends at this year's SXSW, Coachella or basically anywhere men with beards have been and not returned, don't worry.

    17. Design duo Agi & Sam sent out their show invites featuring one of street style's finest senior citizens.

    Another shot of Ali, because seriously:

    While Ali wasn't in attendance, he could most certainly pull off the designers' whimsical printed separates.

    Bonus shot of the full collection's lovely pastel color palette.

    18. Benedict Cumberbatch walked barefoot at Spencer Hart's show.

    Misfits star Nathan Stewart-Jarrett also walked in the show. He managed to keep his shoes on.

    Let's be honest though, he could be a model.

    Though sadly not on the catwalk, Dan Stevens (who will always really be Matthew Crawley, RIP) was also at the show.

    19. JW Anderson continued to push the boundaries of androgyny, or you know, what even constitutes men's clothing.

    CRIMPING IS BACK, GUYS. CRIMPING.

    Of course, this is nothing compared to last season when Anderson showed male models in skirts.

    20. Sibling offered up exciting new possibilities in illogical tan lines.

    I mean, look at this model's wide smile. He's loving this look!

    21. Orlebar Brown's swimwear presentation teased everyone with a model who looks like Madonna's boyfriend Brahim Zaibat.

    22. Otherwise unrelated, but Brahim does feature in the new DSquared2 campaign. So maybe he'll pop up at their show in Milan.

    23. Anyway, back to London. rag & bone handed out pretzels at their show, which were actually consumed by SOME people.

    24. Katie Eary's invite showcased a flamingo wearing one of Nicki Minaj's wigs. Which is basically as good as a fashion show invite can get, unless it's a cupcake.

    25. Sure, "Flamingo Massacres" sounds sad/scary, but the show was brilliant.

    26. Also brilliant: the Alexander McQueen show, which walked in a cavernous venue called "The Coal Yards."

    Models traversed those cobblestones in everything from artfully-distressed lace to sharply-tailored floral suiting.

    27. Savile Row tailor Timothy Everett presented "Findhorn," an intriguing, oddball short film featuring a mysterious lady wandering in the woods.

    Tilda Swinton, naturally.

    Here she is dancing like your Dad on a big rock, still in the woods. There's nothing sedimentary about her moves, come on.

    28. Anyway, lets all go pour glitter in our hair so we look like the models in Christopher Shannon's awesome show.

    This is a teal shade bright enough for My Little Pony. And sparkly too.

    Ok, but let's not go as fair as to wear socks with sandals though.

    29. Here's an angry tweet from Christopher Shannon, though:

    Would quite happily see Burberry burn to the ground right this minute.

    Christopher Shannon

    @shannonmenswear

    Would quite happily see Burberry burn to the ground right this minute.

    Either someone from Burberry doused him in water and thus washed all the glitter out of his hair, or he's angry that the latter label's show (which followed his on the official LC:M schedule) may have leeched some of his would-be viewers.