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Japan is a magical place. Filled with beautiful wonders like cherry blossoms....
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...golden pavilions...
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...and Pokémon planes!
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In Japan, no expense is spared.
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Pets are treated like royalty.
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... Or just a regular old dog.
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Fashion and food are friends.
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As is food and technology.
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In fact, let's just go ahead and say Japanese food is the best. LOOK AT THIS RAMEN.
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Look at these Doritos!
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Such strangely wonderful Doritos.
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Have you ever had Aristocat-themed Disney milk tea before?! Because you can have it in Japan.
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In Japan you can eat EVERY flavor of Kit Kat.
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And eat hot food 24 hours a day...FROM A VENDING MACHINE.
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Most importantly, your food is always insanely adorable.
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Everyone is happy in Japan.
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Because everyone expresses themselves constantly.
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Because why wouldn't you want to dress up as Darth Vader and play baseball?
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Or drink beer and eat sushi on the subway?
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There's a FUCKIN' SALE happening at all times in Japan.
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Where you can buy things like jean thongs.
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Bored? Why not make your own candy and eat it out of a tiny toilet.
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Speaking of toilets, here's a children's book about the life cycle of a dog poop.
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And if all that wasn't enough to convince you to move to Japan — just remember — THEY HAVE A POKÉMON CENTER.
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Now excuse me while I go fall asleep in my capsule hotel.