How To Stop Your Neighbors From Having Loud Sex

Or, alternately, how to get the living crap beat out of yourself. One NSFW word ahead.

Fucking Is Great...Just Not So Late.—Excellent tagline for a TV PSA.

Open on a moonlit shot of our loud lovers...digital clock reads 4:27 AM...Pull back to reveal Matt Damon sitting in a chair besides the bed...MATT: "Is this you? etc., etc...":