1.
At least you didn't get to second base with a monkey today.
2.
At least you didn't leave your trunks in the deep end.
3.
At least you didn't unwittingly take your children to the world's most inappropriate theme park.
4.
At least you aren't these people.
5.
At least no one is taking a photo of your butt without your permission.
6.
At least you're not getting a purple nurple from a two-year-old.
7.
At least you're not drinking bourbon with your eyes.
8.
At least you're not sharing this hotel room with your parents.
9.
At least you're not this baby.
10.
At least the view from your office is better than this.
11.
At least you're not watching tortoises twice your age do the nasty.
12.
At least you're not taking a ride in your dad's Wet Dream.
13.
At least you're not sharing a pull-out with your mother-in-law.
14.
At least you didn't fall in love with a tuna today.
15.
At least you didn't get photobombed by an actual bomb.
16.
At least no one puked on you.
17.
At least you didn't almost drown in a two foot fountain.
18.
At least your office has bathrooms.
19.
At least no one is getting freaky directly behind you.
20.
At least you're not this dolphin.
21.
At least your entire family isn't getting taken down by a wave right now.
22.
At least a camel isn't trying to eat you.
23.
At least you didn't go through the Tunnel of Love with your dad today.
24.
At least you're not wearing wet jeans.
25.
At least you're not taking your last breath at Niagara Falls.
26.
At least you're not at the toilet museum.
27.
At least you're not Grandpa.
