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1. Realizing that you have to go to the DMV.
2. Trying to navigate the DMV website.
3. Printing out all the necessary paperwork before you go and feeling pretty proud of your organizational skills.
4. Getting to the DMV and realizing THERE IS NO PREPARING FOR THE DMV.
5. Wondering why everyone who works at the DMV is so MEAN.
6. Wanting to disappear when you go to the waiting area full of shrieking toddlers and grumpy people.
7. Sitting in the waiting area full of shrieking toddlers and grumpy people for two hours.
8. Realizing that there is no end in sight and you will likely die at the DMV.
9. FINALLY hearing your number called.
10. Sprinting toward your assigned counter with so much desperation and hope.
11. Learning that you’re missing one mystery document that you’ve never heard of because everything is DUMB.
12. Throwing a tantrum in the DMV.
13. Storming out of the DMV and vowing to never return.
14. Checking your car everyday for another parking ticket while you procrastinate on going back to the DMV.
15. Failing inspection for the third time and having to drop hundreds of dollars anyway to fix the problem.
16. Considering just abandoning your car in a Wal-Mart parking lot.
17. Remembering all the fun times you’ve had in your car and regaining your resolve to NEVER GIVE UP, NEVER SURRENDER.
18. Holding your breath as they go through your paperwork for the 1838394023th time.
19. WINNING THE DMV! All your documents are correct and your life won’t be ending today.
20. “Come back in 15 days to finish your application.”
Other suggestions for the real name behind DMV:
Department of Molting Vultures
Department of Moldy Vaginas
Department of Malicious Vagrants
Department of Macabre Vileness
Department of Masochistic Villains
Department of Monster Venom
Department of Malevolent Vehemence
Department of Moody Vampires
And of course…
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