Here's what happens when you live together and your significant other goes out of town...
1.You're sad they're leaving, but you are also kind of looking forward to having the house to yourself.
2.Like, you're gonna binge-watch all the TV shows they absolutely hate.
3.And make/eat all the foods they won't eat.
4.And when you're not stuffing your face and frying your brain with Designing Women episodes, you're going to catch up with all the people you tend to blow off.
5.And pee with the bathroom door OPEN!
6.Except the novelty of peeing with the bathroom door open gets old fast. And you begin to realize being home alone is like a giant barf bag of loneliness.
7.At which point you start turning into a crazy person.
8.You start sending your boyfriend/girlfriend completely non-essential texts all day long.
9.And become paranoid when they don't respond right away.
10.For a lack of better things to do, you decide to clean the house ... the way you like to clean it.
11.And rearrange their stuff the way you want it ... hoping they won't notice.
12.MUAHAHAHHA.
13.At night, you begin hearing noises you didn't even realize your house made and suddenly everything is terrifying.
14.NO SERIOUSLY. WTF IS THAT NOISE I'M PROBABLY ABOUT TO BE MURDERED BYE I LOVE YOU MOM.
15.You find yourself constantly checking in on your S.O.'s social media activity and nothing seems right ... even though that's all completely in your head.
16.You think maybe the cat is starting to have psychological issues because she thinks she's now living in a single-parent household.
17.Like a creep, you may find yourself just touching your loved one's things from time to time.
18....Or smelling them.
19.You tell yourself that you're being ridiculous. (Because you are.)
20.So you just focus on their return. It's cool, I'll just wait like this until you come home.
21.But then they do come home, and you're sooooo relieved and happy.
