It's summer. It's time for wankers to descend on parks everywhere. These include:
16. The dog people.
15. Anyone who does business meetings or networking in the park.
People sitting down near you in the park and talking on their cell phones is one of the most annoying things ever in world history.
14. Yoga people.
13. People with unruly children who won't stop screaming or hurting each other somehow.
12. Trendy young people drinking Red Stripe and talking about how they love 90s things.
11. People who are in FAR too good physical condition to be showing off their bodies in public.
10. Masochists who do military fitness classes led by a shouty instructor.
9. The "hey let's put a tightrope between these trees for some reason" people.
8. The overly amorous couple who are stretching public decency laws to their most extreme limits.
7. A couple having a passionate argument, containing phrases like "I just don't know where we're at anymore."
6. People who play frisbee in an ever-increasing circle around you so it always flies JUST ABOVE your head.
5. People who do a wee anywhere they want.
4. Jugglers.
3. People who do poi (those things on the end of strings that swing around your head).
2. Guitar people, with their meandering plonky noise.
1. Bongo people.
I wonder if the dickhead who brings bongos to the park thinks to himself: "Everyone's gonna love this!"
So these hippies have plotted up in the park behind my house and are now hitting bongos badly... If this is what summer does you can keep it
"I really like the sound of that guy playing his bongos in the park." – No one ever
Bongos in the park. Reminds me of all those parties I used to go to when we'd say "I hope those pricks with Bongos don't turn up."
I feel like relentlessly playing bongos in the park all day non-stop isn't getting me any closer to a music career.
Somebody just showed up to the park with bongos. Time to get out of here.
Wishing a slow painful death to the bongo players in the park. fucking bongos #hatelivingoffbricklane
