14."Oh, this is so terrible. I hate this city and all the wankers who are ruining my happiness."
15."I can’t even watch Crufts anymore."
16.EVEN HE'S GOT ONE?!?
17."Right, fuck this, I’m moving to a farm and I’m going to own 50 dogs and they are all going to be my best friends and we are going to be happy forever."
18.*And breathe*
19.You convince yourself that if you got a dog you would do more exercise.
20.Which is clearly a massive lie.
21.Because when all is said and done, to have one of these:
22.You need a lot of this.
23.And this.
24.And so the sickening realisation sets in — as you're still struggling to feed yourself, a pet really isn't a viable option.
25.Which is just heartbreaking.
26.But one day you will own a pet and on that day you will find true happiness.
