1. When one of your friends says they don't want ice cream after dinner.
2. When you decide to wear a skirt to the bar in the middle of winter and someone asks you why.
3. When you're being hilarious but the person you're talking to just doesn't get your sense of humor.
4. When you learn one of your friends has never read the Harry Potter books but has seen all the movies.
5. When your friend has beer goggles and is crushing on a total weirdo at the bar.
6. When you're helping your friend dress for a Tinder date and they choose a heinous outfit.
7. When you're the mom of your friend group and you're the only one who has their shit together.
8. When you get back from the restroom at a restaurant and you totally know your friends were just talking about you.
9. When your parents are bugging you about cleaning your room even though it's YOUR room.
10. When someone keeps making passive-aggressive comments to you and you've HAD IT.
11. When your friends are being lame and you're trying to drag them to go out.
12. When your friend is trying to drunk sext their crush.
13. When someone behind you starts honking because you didn't immediately go when the traffic light turned green.
14. When one of your friends says they aren't going out on a Friday night because they're "too tired."
15. When you're trying to teach one of your hopeless friends how to be romantic.
16. When your friends think a third round of tequila shots are in order.
17. When someone steals your parking space.
18. When a total creep tries to buy you a drink at the bar.
19. When your boyfriend offers to help you carry in the groceries and you're like "Nah, I got this."
20. When the person you're arguing with doesn't give you the respect you deserve.
21. When you're playing wingman to your friend and he has barbecue sauce all over his shirt.
22. When you see engagement photos from one of your high school classmates on your Facebook timeline.
23. When someone tries to tell you that you AREN'T totally awesome.
24. When it's Friday and you're so tired that you've run out of ways to insult someone.
25. When some just really, really needs to chill out.
26. When some guy catcalls you when you're walking down the street.
27. When you see your crush dancing with someone else, and your friend asks "What's wrong?"
28. And sometimes, the best comebacks are nonverbal, like being TRULY beautiful and getting the man in the end...
29. ...Or saying "No thanks!" with class AND some sass.
